the wonder and the mystery

我來這要談的是有關

of conscious minds.

意識的心智的

The wonder is about the fact

驚奇和神秘。

that we all woke up this morning

驚奇的是

and we had with it

當我們今早起床

the amazing return of our conscious mind.

我們的意識心智

We recovered minds with a complete sense of self

也神奇地自動恢復了。

and a complete sense of our own existence,

我們恢復的心智擁有完整的自我感

yet we hardly ever pause to consider this wonder.

及一個完整的自我存在感，

We should, in fact,

而我們幾乎不曾停下來思考這驚奇。

because without having this possibility of conscious minds,

說實在的，我們應該要，

we would have no knowledge whatsoever

因為沒有這意識心智，

about our humanity;

我們就沒有任何

we would have no knowledge whatsoever about the world.

關於我們人性的知識；

We would have no pains, but also no joys.

我們也將沒有對這個世界的任何知識。

We would have no access to love

我們沒有痛苦，但也沒有歡樂。

or to the ability to create.

我們沒有辦法去愛

And of course, Scott Fitzgerald said famously

也沒有能力去創造。

that "he who invented consciousness

當然，史考特．費傑羅說過一句名言

would have a lot to be blamed for."

『他是那個發明了意識的人

But he also forgot

該被大大地怪罪。』

that without consciousness,

但是他也忘了

he would have no access to true happiness

若沒有意識，

and even the possibility of transcendence.

他是無法去接觸真正的快樂

So much for the wonder, now for the mystery.

甚至也失去了卓越的可能。

This is a mystery

為這神奇講這麼多，現在來看看神祕。

that has really been extremely hard to elucidate.

這是一個謎

All the way back into early philosophy

一直是極難被釐清的謎。

and certainly throughout the history of neuroscience,

甚至追溯到早期的哲學

this has been one mystery

當然也貫串了整個神經科學的歷史，

that has always resisted elucidation,

這一直都是個謎

has got major controversies.

也一直抗拒著解釋，

And there are actually many people

有著主要的爭論。

that think we should not even touch it;

事實上還有很多人

we should just leave it alone, it's not to be solved.

甚至覺得我們不該碰它；

I don't believe that,

我們應該讓它去，它不該被解答。

and I think the situation is changing.

我不信這一套，

It would be ridiculous to claim

而且我覺得情況正在改變。

that we know how we make consciousness

這是很荒謬的去宣稱說

in our brains,

我們知道意識如何

but we certainly can begin

在我們的腦中產生，

to approach the question,

但我們絕對能開始

and we can begin to see the shape of a solution.

去著手研究這問題，

And one more wonder to celebrate

也可開始看到答案的樣子。

is the fact that we have imaging technologies

還有另外一個可慶祝的驚奇

that now allow us to go inside the human brain

那就是我們有造影科技

and be able to do, for example,

現在讓我們能進到人腦中

what you're seeing right now.

而能做到，舉個例子

These are images that come from Hanna Damasio's lab,

你現正看到的。

and which show you, in a living brain,

這些影像來自漢娜．達馬西歐的實驗室，

the reconstruction of that brain.

你可以看到，在一個活的腦裡，

And this is a person who is alive.

腦的重組。

This is not a person

這是個活著的人。

that is being studied at autopsy.

這不是一個

And even more --

在驗屍的時候才被研究的人。

and this is something that one can be really amazed about --

當然還有—

is what I'm going to show you next,

讓人非常驚奇的—

which is going underneath the surface of the brain

是我接著要展示給你看的，

and actually looking in the living brain

這發生在腦的表面下

at real connections, real pathways.

真的在看一個活著的腦

So all of those colored lines

真實的連結，真實的傳導路徑。

correspond to bunches of axons,

所有這些上了色的線

the fibers that join cell bodies

會對應到整束的軸突，

to synapses.

那些纖維會從神經細胞體連結

And I'm sorry to disappoint you, they don't come in color.

到突觸。

But at any rate, they are there.

只是很抱歉讓你失望，它們不是彩色的。

The colors are codes for the direction,

但無論如何，它們都在那。

from whether it is back to front

顏色則標示著方向。

or vice versa.

可以是從後面到前面

At any rate, what is consciousness?

或是反過來(從後面到前面)。

What is a conscious mind?

那麽，到底什麼是意識？

And we could take a very simple view

什麼是有意識的心智？

and say, well, it is that which we lose

我們可以從一個非常簡單的角度來看

when we fall into deep sleep without dreams,

我們可以說，所謂意識是我們失去的

or when we go under anesthesia,

在我們熟睡而不作夢時，

and it is what we regain

或是當我們被麻醉時，

when we recover from sleep

醒來後所恢復的東西

or from anesthesia.

也就是從睡眠中

But what is exactly that stuff that we lose under anesthesia,

或是從麻醉中醒來恢復的東西。

or when we are in deep, dreamless sleep?

到底當我們在麻醉中，或是當我們在無夢的沉睡裡，

Well first of all,

失去的是什麼?

it is a mind,

這個嘛首先，

which is a flow of mental images.

就是我們的心智，

And of course consider images

也就是內心影像流。

that can be sensory patterns,

當然我們所謂的這些影像

visual, such as you're having right now

那可以是感官的型式，

in relation to the stage and me,

視覺的，就像是你現在正看到的一樣

or auditory images,

與講台還有我之間的空間關係。

as you are having now in relation to my words.

或是聽覺的影像。

That flow of mental images

像是你現在正與我講的話之間的關係。

is mind.

那些流動的內心影像

But there is something else

就是心智。

that we are all experiencing in this room.

但，還有其它東西

We are not passive exhibitors

是我們在這個空間裡都正在體驗的。

of visual or auditory

我們並非被動的陳列展示者

or tactile images.

接受著視覺或聽覺

We have selves.

或觸覺的影像。

We have a Me

我們擁有自我。

that is automatically present

我們是有一個我

in our minds right now.

那是自主地存在

We own our minds.

於我們的腦中。

And we have a sense that it's everyone of us

我們擁有我們的心智。

that is experiencing this --

而且我們可以意識到這是我們每一個人

not the person who is sitting next to you.

當下都在體驗的 —

So in order to have a conscious mind,

而不是坐在你隔壁的人在體驗你。

you have a self within the conscious mind.

所以要有一個具有意識的心智，

So a conscious mind is a mind with a self in it.

你的自我需要存在於有意識的心智中。

The self introduces the subjective perspective in the mind,

所以有意識的心智指，包含著自我的心智。

and we are only fully conscious

自我引導我們心智中主觀的看法。

when self comes to mind.

唯有這樣我們才是完全的清醒

So what we need to know to even address this mystery

也就是當我們的自我能呈現給心智時。

is, number one, how are minds are put together in the brain,

所以光要解這個謎我們必須知道

and, number two, how selves are constructed.

的是，第一點，我們的心智如何在腦中組合。

Now the first part, the first problem,

而第二點，是自我是如何建構的。

is relatively easy -- it's not easy at all --

現在第一個部分，就是第一個問題，

but it is something that has been approached gradually in neuroscience.

是相對簡單的 — 它其實一點也不簡單 —

And it's quite clear that, in order to make minds,

但是在神經科學上已漸漸被研究。

we need to construct neural maps.

而這也是顯而易見的，為了要有心智，

So imagine a grid, like the one I'm showing you right now,

我們需建構神經圖譜。

and now imagine, within that grid,

所以想像有個格子圖，像你們看到的這個。

that two-dimensional sheet,

現在想像，在這格子圖中，

imagine neurons.

有個二維的表，

And picture, if you will,

想像神經細胞。

a billboard, a digital billboard,

接著想像，

where you have elements

一個廣告看板，一數位的廣告看板，

that can be either lit or not.

上面所有的元素

And depending on how you create the pattern

可以是亮或不亮。

of lighting or not lighting,

你可以通過讓元素亮或不亮

the digital elements,

來創造圖案。

or, for that matter, the neurons in the sheet,

這數位的元素，

you're going to be able to construct a map.

或就這來說，是在格子上的神經元，

This, of course, is a visual map that I'm showing you,

你將能建構一個圖譜。

but this applies to any kind of map --

這當然，是我正在展示給你看的視覺圖譜。

auditory, for example, in relation to sound frequencies,

且這可應用到任一種圖譜 --

or to the maps that we construct with our skin

像是聽覺的，就像與聽覺頻率的關係。

in relation to an object that we palpate.

或是與我們的皮膚建構的圖譜

Now to bring home the point

來描述與我們碰觸的物體之間的關係。

of how close it is --

現在回到重點

the relationship between the grid of neurons

我們想知道—

and the topographical arrangement

格子裡的神經元間

of the activity of the neurons

和位置上的排列

and our mental experience --

所活化的神經元

I'm going to tell you a personal story.

還有我們的意象經驗之間的關係 --

So if I cover my left eye --

我將要告訴你一個我自己的故事。

I'm talking about me personally, not all of you --

所以，如果我遮住我的左眼 --

if I cover my left eye,

我正在說的是我個人，不是你們全部的人—

I look at the grid -- pretty much like the one I'm showing you.

如果我遮住我的左眼，

Everything is nice and fine and perpendicular.

我看著這個格子—很像我正在展示給你看的。

But sometime ago, I discovered

甚麼都是平整且清楚互相垂直的。

that if I cover my left eye,

但是前一陣子，我發現

instead what I get is this.

當我遮住我的左眼的時候，

I look at the grid and I see a warping

我看到的其實是這個。

at the edge of my central-left field.

我看著格子而我看到的是扭曲變形

Very odd -- I've analyzed this for a while.

在我左視野的邊緣。

But sometime ago,

很奇怪的—我已經分析這一陣子了。

through the help of an opthamologist colleague of mine,

但前些日子，

Carmen Puliafito,

經我一位眼科醫師同事的幫忙，

who developed a laser scanner of the retina,

卡門．普利菲都，

I found out the the following.

他發展了一套視網膜的雷射掃描，

If I scan my retina

我發現下面這個。

through the horizontal plane that you see there in the little corner,

當我掃視我的視網膜

what I get is the following.

你看到在那小角落經過的一個平行平面，

On the right side, my retina is perfectly symmetrical.

我得到的是下面這個。

You see the going down towards the fovea

在右手邊，我的視網膜是完整的對稱著。

where the optic nerve begins.

你看這個往視小窩

But on my left retina there is a bump,

也就是視神經開始的地方。

which is marked there by the red arrow.

但在我的左視網膜這是有一個凸起，

And it corresponds to a little cyst

在這裡用紅色的箭頭標示著。

that is located below.

而這對應著一個小腫瘤

And that is exactly what causes

就位在它的下方。

the warping of my visual image.

那東西就是造成

So just think of this:

我的視覺影像扭曲變形。

you have a grid of neurons,

所以就想想這個：

and now you have a plane mechanical change

你有一格子的神經元，

in the position of the grid,

而你現在在格子的位置裏

and you get a warping of your mental experience.

有一平面的力學改變，

So this is how close

而你的心智經驗有扭曲變形。

your mental experience

所以從這裡可以看到

and the activity of the neurons in the retina,

你的心智經驗

which is a part of the brain located in the eyeball,

和神經元在視網膜的活動有多接近，

or, for that matter, a sheet of visual cortex.

視網膜也就是位於眼球中的部份的腦，

So from the retina

或者，在這個例子裏，是一片視覺腦迴。

you go onto visual cortex.

所以從視網膜

And of course, the brain adds on

你繼續傳到視覺的腦迴。

a lot of information

而且當然，腦會繼續加入

to what is going on

一大堆的訊息

in the signals that come from the retina.

給正在發生的事情

And in that image there,

特別是從視網膜來的訊息。

you see a variety of islands

也在那影像那裡，

of what I call image-making regions in the brain.

你看到一些不同的腦島

You have the green for example,

那是我稱作腦中影像製造的區域。

that corresponds to tactile information,

舉例來說你有綠色的，

or the blue that corresponds to auditory information.

那會對應到觸覺的訊息，

And something else that happens

或是藍色的區對應到聽覺訊息。

is that those image-making regions

還有其它發生的是

where you have the plotting

就是這些影像製造區

of all these neural maps,

也就是你一開始

can then provide signals

畫這些神經圖譜的地方，

to this ocean of purple that you see around,

可以接著提供訊號

which is the association cortex,

給這些你看到紫色的海的周圍，

where you can make records of what went on

這裏是腦迴連結，

in those islands of image-making.

就是你紀錄發生過的事

And the great beauty

在這些影像製造的腦島的地方。

is that you can then go from memory,

還有真正漂亮的

out of those association cortices,

是可以讓你從記憶中，

and produce back images

提取出這些連結區的腦迴，

in the very same regions that have perception.

再製造出影像

So think about how wonderfully convenient and lazy

在處理感覺的區域。

the brain is.

所以想想我們的腦袋是多麼的神奇方便

So it provides certain areas

和偷懶。

for perception and image-making.

我們的腦提供特定的區域

And those are exactly the same

來處理感官知覺與製造影像。

that are going to be used for image-making

而這些是完全一樣的

when we recall information.

都是準備用來製造影像

So far the mystery of the conscious mind

當我們提取資訊時。

is diminishing a little bit

目前為止神奇的意識心智

because we have a general sense

是有點在消退了

of how we make these images.

因為我們對製造這些影像的過程

But what about the self?

有了整體的概念。

The self is really the elusive problem.

但是關於自我呢？

And for a long time,

自我真的是一個非常難理解的問題。

people did not even want to touch it,

有很長一段時間，

because they'd say,

人們根本不想去碰它，

"How can you have this reference point, this stability,

因為他們會說，

that is required to maintain

『你如何找到一個必要的參考點，

the continuity of selves day after day?"

一個穩定性，來維持

And I thought about a solution to this problem.

一天接著一天連續的自我？

It's the following.

而我為這個問題想到一個解答。

We generate brain maps

就像下面這樣。

of the body's interior

我們產生腦中

and use them as the reference for all other maps.

關於身體的內部的地圖

So let me tell you just a little bit about how I came to this.

再把它們當作其它地圖的參考點。

I came to this because,

就讓我來透露一點我是怎麼得到這結論的。

if you're going to have a reference that we know as self --

我得到這個結論因為，

the Me, the I

如果你將要有個我們叫做自我的參考點 --

in our own processing --

那個我，本人

we need to have something that is stable,

在我們自己的處理上 --

something that does not deviate much

我們需要個穩定的東西，

from day to day.

有個不會偏移太多的東西

Well it so happens that we have a singular body.

日復一日。

We have one body, not two, not three.

而剛好我們有一個單一的身體。

And so that is a beginning.

我們有一個身體，而不是兩個，不是三個。

There is just one reference point, which is the body.

所以這就是一個開端。

But then, of course, the body has many parts,

唯一的一個參考點，也就是身體。

and things grow at different rates,

當然，身體是有很多部位的，

and they have different sizes and different people;

不同的部位是以不同的速度在成長，

however, not so with the interior.

大小會不同，異人而已；

The things that have to do

但是，內在就不是這樣了。

with what is known as our internal milieu --

與我們已知的內在環境

for example, the whole management

有關的事 --

of the chemistries within our body

打個比方，整個管理

are, in fact, extremely maintained

我們身體內的化學

day after day

是，事實上，極端的被維持著