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Chris: Hey
嘿
Is anyone sitting here?
有人坐這嗎?
Karen: O-oh, uh... no
噢..噢 沒有
Uh, go ahead
請坐
*burps*
不好意思
*laughter*
不好意思
Chris: Oh
不好意思!
Excuse me
你可以幫我顧下東西嗎?
Chris: Excuse me!
我得去一下廁所
Chris: EXCUSE ME!
喔!當然好!
Hey... Can you watch my stuff?
我會幫你...顧..
I have to go to the bathroom
..東西
Karen: Oh yea, sure! I'll watch...
謝啦
...your stuff
你叫什麼?
Chris: Thanks! W-what's your name?
Karen
Karen: Karen
Chris
Chris: Chris
Chris~
Karen: Chrissss...
Chris的東西~
Chris' stuff...
Chris的東西
Chris' stuff
水壺, 帽子
Bottle, hat, journal, tablet, laptop, camera, phone!?
日記本, 平板
That's a lot to keep track of...
筆電, 相機
...and everything is so expensive!
手機?!
The total cost is at least...
有好多東西要顧...
A LOT OF MONEY!
而且每個東西都好貴
I don't even have a checking account.
這些至少要價...
This is too much responsibility.
...很多錢!
*clock ticking*
我連支票帳戶都沒有
Karen: What's taking him so long?
這責任實在太重大了
I thought he was only going number 1
為什麼他還沒回來?
If he's taking a dump, then why didn't he take his phone?
我以為他只是去上一號
Heh, that's so Chris
如果他是去便便
Oh no!
那他為什麼不帶著手機呢?
I need to go to the restroom, too.
他都這樣啦
Should I ask a stranger to watch...
喔不
...my stuff?
我也得去廁所
But that means they would have to watch my stuff and the stuff I'm watching for Chris
我該請別的陌生人幫忙顧...
What if that stranger has to pee too?
我的東西?
Then, they need to find a stranger to watch their stuff, the stuff they're watching for a stranger
但這就表示他要幫忙顧我的東西, 還有Chris的東西
and the stuff that stranger is watching for Chris.
那如果陌生人到時候也想上廁所呢?!
Uhhh, I don't think I can hold much longer.
那他就只能請另外一個陌生人顧他的東西
Too sleepy!
還有他幫陌生人顧的東西
Too far!
還有陌生人幫忙顧的Chris的東西!
Too shady!
喔我不能忍太久
I can't trust anyone!
太愛睏
*phone buzzes*
太遠
Karen: ALWAYS?!
太可疑
But it's not my phone.
沒人能信任
Wait-
**必接電話**
What if someone is in danger?
必接?!
Oh my god, I killed someone.
但那不是我的手機啊
*phone buzzes again*
等等!
Karen: Hi, uh, Chris' phone
如果有人遇到危險呢?
Who's this?
我的天我害死人了
Caller: Uuhhh, this is Chris' girlfriend...
嗨! 這是Chris的手機
Who the hell are you?!
請問哪裡找?
Hold on-
呃...我是Chris的女朋友
Are you Janice?
你是誰啊?!!
Because he keeps talking about a Janice and I have no idea who that is
等等, 你是Janice嗎?
*music builds as caller fades away to sound of people drinking water*
Chris最近一直提到Janice...
Karen: I have to pee
我要去廁所
Chris: Hey
嘿
Chris: My stuff
我的東西!
Karen: Thank god, I have to go to restroom so..
太好了, 我要去廁所, 所以..
Off-screen person: No, no, no! Wait!
不不不..等等!
Another Chris: Karen, stop!
Karen, 等等!
Karen: What the fu-
搞什麼...
Chris: Karen
Karen, 別理他說的任何一句話
Chris: Don't listen to anything this man says
你是誰?
Karen: Who are you?
我是Chris
The other Chris: I'm Chris!
他是個冒牌貨
He's an imposter!
我是Chris
Chris: I'm Chris!
我請這個人幫我顧東西
I asked this man to watch my stuff, and he stole everything from me
然後他把我的東西全都偷走了
Including my identity!
連我的名字都偷!
The other Chris: Trust me...
相信我
Both Chrises: I'm Chris; These are my things
我是Chris, 這些是我的東西
Both Chrises: Stop it, you're just copying my- The other Chris: sandwiches
停止, 你只是一直在學我的三..明治
The other Chris: Ah-ha!
哈哈!
Karen: Quiet!
別吵了!
Karen: So, the real Chris would know about his phone, right?
那麼, 真正的Chris
Chris: mhm
我們都知道這手機,對吧?
Karen: So what's the passcode?
那密碼是多少?
The other Chris: 1-2-3-4
1234
Chris: That is the most common passcode in the world, okay?
那是世界上最常見的密碼好嗎!
So...
不信你去查
Chris: Look it up
Chris!
*phone buzzes*
總算找到你了
Chris' Girlfriend: Chris!
搞什麼!
There you are!
哈囉
Chris' Girlfriend: What the hel-
哈囉?
Chris: Hello?
所以..你能幫我顧東西..?
Hello?
不行!
So, can you watch my stuff?
但我真的很需要去上廁所..
Karen: No!
Chris: Um, I really have to use the bathroom though
[BTS] Anyway, Leenda's here
Yaaaay! Hi!
Chris is back
Chris' back on Wong Fu's channel...
...being
Off-screen person: He just did it!
*laughter*
Hey, this is Julie
Ummm, and Julie is playing the friend in this short