Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles Have you ever heard of the expression 'old soul'? You know, that one friend who, instead of going to a rager of a party, they'd rather have a couple of drinks with a few good friends? Sometimes not even drinks, but just coffee? Sometimes not even coffee, but tea? You know, grandmas in disguise: the old souls. The term actually has no base in psychology and the interpretation of it changes from person to person. For some people, it means somebody mature beyond their age. For others, it's someone who has gone through many different reincarnations of life; a person who draws from their years of past lives' wisdom. To be clear, the idea of old souls has been debunked by science. However, some of the biggest believers of old souls are nurses who deliver babies who don't cry at all, like the whole 'being born' thing ain't nothing. Being an old soul has its advantages, but one disadvantage is trouble in relationships. First, old souls usually come from single-parent households. The thing about coming from a single-parent household is that kids may be forced to mature faster than others. Having to deal with divorce is a very sobering experience that can make kids mature quickly. However, growing up in a single-parent household, they don't really grow up with a stable relationship present in their lives. This means they can have trouble with their own stable relationships as they get older. There is a term that's close to 'old souls' that has scientific basis: pseudomature. This term refers to kids, teens and young adults who seem older than they are. Pseudomature kids are often the result of single-parent households and can be called 'old souls.' Secondly, old souls prefer the company of older people. Because old souls feel older, they feel a disconnect with people their age. Usually, for the first couple of decades of your life, you're surrounded by a majority of people your age. Old souls usually end up hanging out with older people, so when they get into relationships with someone their age, it's hard. An old soul probably won't fit in with their partner's friends. The other side of the coin is that they date someone older than them, which brings its own problems of pushing social norms, like, what if someone dies well before the other? Age difference also may cause problems when a couple tries to have kids. All this and more can bring a lot of stress to a relationship. The third thing with old souls is that they've got very high standards. Assuming they've lived many lives and been in many relationships, they're subconsciously comparing their current relationship to their best past ones. They know what they want. This constant comparison can lead to a lack of satisfaction and stress. Imagine remembering all the great loves of your life. Trying to get over those and simultaneously falling in love with someone else. It's hard. And their partners end up feeling judged and evaluated. This can lead to frustration for both parties. Sometimes, they seem distant because they don't want to be hurt again. As well, they have a strong sense of identity. They're stubborn in their ways and they don't try new things. Since they've lived so many lives, they've tried everything. They end up having a very well-established personality as well. This can make dating hard when you keep trying to spice things up with new adventures but your partner seems uninterested. It becomes very frustrating and difficult to deal with. Fifth and finally, old souls have a very strong sense of purpose. After years and years in different lives spent doing the basics like getting a job, getting married, having kids, et cetera, old souls start to want more from life; to have one of their lives have an actual impact, to mean something, like a legacy. What this means is that they are very driven people: they have goals and want to do things that matter. Sometimes, that means their relationships take a back seat. Or sometimes you can feel like you're just some tool to their success. On the other hand, it can be very inspiring to be in love with someone with goals. It's important to find a balance between the two. These are the five ways falling in love with an old soul can be hard, but well worth-it.
A2 US older parent age mature older people falling Falling in Love With Old Souls 125 7 歐小拉 posted on 2018/08/03 More Share Save Report Video vocabulary