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  • In 1985, Robert Sternberg

  • presented a theory that has piqued the interest of various people

  • A theory concretising something that has baffled the minds

  • and wrenched the hearts of many - Love

  • He called it the "Triangular Theory of Love"

  • As it's best explained in the form of a triangle

  • but it's more commonly known as "Sternberg's Theory of Love"

  • In the context of interpersonal relationships

  • there are three components of love

  • intimacy, passion and commitment

  • According to the theory, intimacy

  • is the feeling of attachment

  • closeness, and connectedness

  • Passion, on the other hand, is

  • the fiery depth and intenseness you experience when you like someone

  • encompassing the drive connected to

  • both romantic and sexual attraction

  • The third component, commitment, ties the other two together

  • as it encompasses short-term and

  • long-term decisions to remain with one another and plan for the future

  • According to Sternberg's Theory of Love

  • there are six forms of love which are

  • combinations of the three components previously described

  • One, Nonlove

  • Nonlove is merely the absence

  • of all three components

  • This basically characterises the majority of our personal relationships which consists of simple

  • casual interactions

  • It could apply to your acquaintances, or to people who you're not particularly attached to

  • Two, Friendship

  • Friendship exists when only intimacy is present

  • This is the set of feelings you experience

  • without the intense passion or commitment of romance

  • It can however be a root for other forms of love to manifest from

  • 00:01:42,495 --> 00:01:44,755 Three, Infatuated Love

  • Infatuation occurs when passion is present

  • and both intimacy and commitment is absent

  • Crushes fall under this category

  • Solely sexual relationships are also included

  • as they are only bounded by carnal desires and nothing more

  • This is the most common root of romantic love as it's believed that

  • intimacy develops over time

  • But if neither intimacy nor commitment develops, this type of love

  • can fizzle over time

  • Four, Empty Love

  • An example of empty love is an unhappy marriage

  • where intimacy and the flames of passion for your partner is gone

  • As a strong love deteriorates into empty love

  • nothing is left but the contract of marriage itself

  • It's characterised by the absence of intimacy and passion

  • despite the presence of commitment

  • Arranged marriages, on the other hand, can start out as empty loves

  • but can develop into other forms of love over time

  • Five, Romantic Love

  • Romantic love is a combination of intimacy and passion

  • Relationships under this category

  • not only involve physical bonds, but emotional bonds as well

  • This is one of the most common stepping stones to married life

  • However, it lacks commitment

  • This type of relationship is easier to dissolve, with

  • no legal issues, if you and your partner have had enough of it

  • Six, Companionate Love

  • Companionate Love is characterised by a combination of

  • intimacy and commitment, and the absence of passion

  • It's stronger than Friendship Love because of the addition of commitment

  • It's observed in long-term marriages where

  • you don't necessarily need passion in order to stay in love with your partner

  • because affection still remains

  • Companionate Love can also be found among family members and close

  • friends who have strong platonic friendships

  • Seven, Fatuous Love

  • A good example of a Fatuous Love is when Kim Kardashian

  • married Kris Humphries, only to divorce him 72 days later

  • It's a whirlwind of romance we usually see on television

  • Fatuous Love is the combination of commitment and passion

  • without intimacy

  • Eight, Consummate Love

  • Consummate Love sits at the very centre of the triangle

  • as it's said to be the perfect ideal type of love

  • All three components are present in this type of love

  • and it's the goal for people in relationships

  • According to Sternberg, couples experiencing

  • Consummate Love would continue to be sexually intimate years into the relationship

  • and they can't imagine themselves being happier with other partners

  • They work through their difficulties and

  • find a light in their relationships

  • However, Sternberg cautions that maintaining this relationship is harder than

  • achieving it and it's not a permanent form of love

  • With that, do you agree with the types of love that

  • Sternberg proposes?

  • What other factors do you think affect a relationship?

  • Do you think the six forms of love are global?

  • Or is there a subjective perspective for every couple?

  • Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below

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In 1985, Robert Sternberg

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