Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles (typing) - Hey! Okay, so I got two different types of tile that we can choose from, and I think this one's nice. It's a little bit more simple. And then this-- - No, I told you, you do the tiles. I don't care. I don't have an opinion and I have to get this pitch done for Adventure Baby. I don't even know what I'm doing. - Okay. - Okay? - Please, please, please, please. Take this. Take this away. - Alright, I'll figure it out. - Thank you. - I'm sorry. (keyboard clacking) Jason? - What? - Have you been using my iPad? - Your iPad? - Oh, no. You've been going to porn sites. - No, no I haven't. - Do not masturbate with my iPad, Jason. And you're busy. Oh, yeah, you're so busy. You're busy masturbating with my iPad. That's how busy you are. - The internet is so fast on there. I'm sorry. - Jason, why are you masturbating anyway, huh? Hello, I'm open for business. - Yeah. - And you look great. I just... You know, we've been getting along so well lately. I don't want to ruin the friendship. (cymbal tapping) - Hey. - (Woman) Hey there. - Oooo! Whoa! Whoa, look at that. Lookin' good. That's the old...that's the old nighty. That's the little action nighty. - (Woman) Yes. - Yep. - We can do it tonight. - You know what? I really, I really... I would love to, it's just... Can I be honest? - Of course. What? - You won't tell anyone? - Who am I gonna tell? - Okay. I've just been like... I'm really bumming out about my penis lately. - What? - It's really small. - No it's not. It really isn't. - No it's...it's... - It's fine. - I stand in the mirror and I'm like, what's going on? It's so small. It's just not...and it's not fun. It's not fun for me having a small penis. It's like, it's like having someone in your band that isn't good. You know? It's like... It just ruins all of it. - Have you been watching too much porn? - I have been watching a lot of porn. - How much would you say you've been masterbating? - Like three or four everyday. Is that a lot? - Yeah. - Yeah. That is a lot. - That's a lot. - Well hey, got no problem in that area. Lot of guys have problems. Not me. - Dad! It's me. Hello! Jason can you come in here please? I don't under... - (Jason) What?! - Can you come in here and help with the...? I don't under... - (Jason) The what? - With the Facetime on the I... I don't understand if it's work... Dad, hi! - I can hear you but I can't see you. Where are you? - (Jason) Hold on. - Okay look for the camera guys. - Hold on. - I see...hi. - Hi. - I see you. That... - Is that you live? I mean it's not a video? This is really you now, live? - Yes! You're talking to me right now. What kind of ques... What are you... Can you hear me? - You know, we went to a party today and we really had a great time. - Jason we thought about you. There was a clown. He was fabulous but you would have been better. - Yeah, you know, maybe Jason you should think about doing some clowning at some parties for kids. You know, you've given this comedy thing a shot but let's get real, it's not... I don't think it's really working out for you. Maybe you should try clowning. - I, I don't want to be a party clown Joe. - No he's... I don't want to be. - Stop, stop, stop. That's not what I want to do with my life. So... - Just stop. Just stop. Dad he's not gonna be a clown alright? Just enough with the clown? - I'm not a clown. - He doesn't...he doesn't even know how to make the balloon animals. There's like... No, he's not a clown. - It's not the same thing. A stand up is not the same thing as a clown. I know that you think that it is. - Wait, just stop. J, J. Just stop, just stop. - Are you sure this is you live? We're talking live? Real time? (jazz music) - (Jason) Oh my god. Okay. Okay here we go. You ready? - Yeah, yeah. - Are you ready? - Yeah! - Okay. - Okay, Jason... - (Jason) Oh god that's it. - You're like... - (Jason) Oh god that's good. Oh wow. - What? - (Jason) Ugh! - What?! - Ugh! Oooo god! Whooo! Oh my god baby! Oh my god that's good! Whoo! Oh my god. - That was it? - You're so good. Is that not good? - No that wasn't good. That was weird and aweful. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You know what it is? You are so hot. It's, it's... You know what it is? It's a compliment. You're so, you're so hot. You know what? You're the real thing and no more porn for me. - Alright well... I guess thanks for the compliment. - You're welcome. I love you. - Yeah... I'm gonna just...I'm gonna go to the bathroom. - Okay. Oh you know what I would love right now? Doritos. - (Gasp) I think I hear her. Listen Mom, I'm gonna go get her. - Go, go ahead! Go get the baby, we want to see her! - So just don't disconnect cause I don't want to go through that again okay? (moans) - What's going on? - I don't know. What...what is that? What are we seeing? (screams) - (Woman) Yes! Yes! - (Gasp) Oh my god! - (Woman) Yes! Yes! - No wonder he doesn't want to get a job! He sits around the house jerking off all day! - Oh my god! Oh no! - (Woman) Yes! Oh god, oh god! - J? (knocks) - Are you in there? (knocks) Do you have my I-pad? - Oh my god. - Mom? Are you here? Got disconnected. Come here Char. (band music)
A2 US jason clown god porn ipad masturbating Jason Nash Is Married - Deleted Scene - Too Much Masturbating 94 1 SANEI posted on 2019/05/16 More Share Save Report Video vocabulary