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Hello, I am Gina.
哈囉,我是 Gina 。
Do you think it's possible for a person to love you too much?
你覺得一個人可能會愛你愛過頭嗎?
This is exactly what happened to me.
這正是發生在我身上的事。
I first saw Brad in school, and he was such a handsome boy, with the prettiest smile I'd ever seen.
第一次遇見 Brad 是在學校,他是我見過擁有最燦爛笑容的帥氣男孩。
Every day I was hoping he would notice me.
每一天我都期待著他注意到我。
And it finally happened.
然後這事終於發生了。
He came to me and asked if I was free that evening.
他走向我並問我當晚是否有空。
And it was the happiest day of my life.
那是我人生中最幸福的一天。
That evening, we went to the movies and then for a walk in the park.
那天晚上,我們去看了電影,然後在公園散步。
And it was super romantic.
真的是浪漫到了極點。
Not long after it, we started to date.
不久之後,我們就開始交往了。
And first few weeks were perfect.
剛開始的幾個禮拜,一切都非常完美。
We were seeing each other every day, and he always told me how beautiful I was.
我們每天都會約會,他也總會不停說我很美。
And when we weren't together, he was texting to me how much he loved and missed me.
當我們不在一起時,他都會傳簡訊跟我說他多愛我、多想念我。
It was sweet.
真的很甜蜜。
But sometimes I was busy with school or seeing my friends, and during that time, he was texting me non-stop.
但是有時候,當我在忙學校的事或跟朋友見面時,他也會在期間不斷地傳訊息給我。
One day, I was doing homework, and when I finished, I looked at my phone, and there were hundreds of texts and missed calls!
有一天,我正在寫作業,完成時看了一下手機,竟然有上百則訊息和未接來電!
First ones were like, "I love you," "I miss you."
一開始都是「我愛你」、「我想你」之類的訊息。
But then it was something like, "Are you alright?" "Where are you?" "Why don't you answer me?"
但之後都是「你還好嗎?」、「你在哪裡?」、「為什麼不回訊息?」等問題。
I called Brad and said, "I'm sorry for not answering; I was busy with my homework."
我打電話跟 Brad 說:「都沒有回覆,對不起,我剛忙著寫作業。」
He said, "OK, but call me next time, because I'm worried."
他回答:「沒關係,但下次打個電話給我,因為我會擔心。」
It was quite sweet the first time. But then it happened again and again.
第一次發生時,我還覺得很甜蜜。但這種事情卻一再地發生。
Each time when I wasn't able to answer him right away, even if it was during a lesson, he started to panic.
每當我無法馬上回覆時,他就會開始焦慮,就算我正在上課也一樣。
One time, he even knocked on a classroom door and asked the teacher for me to come out.
有一次,他甚至敲了我們教室的們,請老師讓我跟他出去。
It was so embarrassing.
真的超級難為情。
Brad always wanted to be with me, like, all the time.
Brad 隨時都想跟我黏在一起,無時無刻都想。
He was visibly upset if I decided to spend some time with my friends instead of him.
如果我決定去找朋友,而不是跟他在一起,他就會明顯露出不開心的樣子。
Honestly, it was kind of a turn-off at this point.
說實話,那個時候我只覺得很倒胃口。
It was hard to like a boy who didn't give you any space.
要喜歡一個不給你任何空間的男孩實在是太難了。
I told my friends about it, and they thought I was selfish because he just loved me very much.
我和朋友們訴苦,但他們認為我太自私,因為他只是太愛我了。
So I kept going, thinking it would get better eventually.
所以我就繼續維持這段關係,一直想著事情最終會變好。
Of course, it didn't.
結果當然是沒有。
It only got worse.
情況只是變得更糟。
He was waiting for me to come out of class after each lesson and insisted on us always being together.
他每節下課都來接我,並堅持我們要一直待在一起。
At this point, even my friends realized that something was wrong.
到這個時候,連我朋友們也感覺不太對勁。
When I told him that I wanted to spend some time separately, he got mad, saying, "You don't love me anymore!"
當我跟他說,我想要有些個人空間後,他氣瘋了,還說:「你不愛我了。」
I had to prove him wrong.
我得向他證明他誤會了。
So, the only time without him was at home. And even then, he was texting me constantly.
於是,我唯一沒跟他在一起的時間,就是在家。但就算這樣,他還是不停傳簡訊給我。
The last straw for me, was when I was talking to Johnny, my classmate, about the project we were doing together for school.
讓我徹底崩潰的,就是我在跟我同學 Johnny 討論學校報告的那天。
And Brad came to us, faced Johnny, and said to him, "Stop talking to her; she's mine!"
然後 Brad 跑來找我們,轉向 Johnny 並跟他說:「不要跟她講話,她是我的!」
I tried to explain to Brad that he should calm down, Johnny's just a classmate.
我試著跟 Brad 解釋,叫他冷靜下來,Johnny 只是我同學。
But he wouldn't listen, trying to act like a man and protect me.
但 Brad 不願意聽,試著裝出男子漢的樣子保護我。
Johnny got up and left, muttering, "Weirdo."
Johnny 起身離開,並吐出:「怪人」。
I was so embarrassed.
我當下真的覺得很丟臉。
So I told Brad, "It's not okay! You act like a stalker! Can you stop?"
所以我跟 Brad 說:「你不能這樣!你根本跟蹤狂沒兩樣!你可以停手嗎?」
And he answered, "I do it because I love you."
他的回答是:「我做這些都是因為我愛你。」
I didn't know why Brad was acting like that.
我當時不知道 Brad 為什麼會有那種行為。
But I didn't see him as this cool, confident boy I had seen before.
但我已經不把眼前的他視為當初那又酷又有自信的男孩了。
So, of course, my feelings sort of changed.
想當然的,我對他的感覺也變了。
So later that day, I said that I didn't want to date him anymore.
於是當天稍晚,我跟他說我不想再跟他交往了。
He begged me to reconsider. He said he was sorry, like a hundred times.
他求我重新考慮。他一而再,再而三地不停道歉。
And when I said no, he got angry and implied that I liked Johnny, and that's why I was dumping him.
當我拒絕時,他就發怒並影射我是因為喜歡上 Johnny 才甩了他。
He was texting me every day for two weeks.
接下來的兩週,他每天都傳訊息給我。
Saying how much he missed me.
一直跟我說他有多想我。
And I explained over and over to him that I didn't want to date anymore.
我也一直不斷地跟他解釋說我不想跟交往了。
For a few days, he was silent. And I thought he must have moved on.
接著有幾天,他毫無動靜。我以為他一定是已經放下了。
But then, he called me and said, "Can you please look out your window?"
但在那之後,他打了電話給我說:「可以請妳看一下窗外嗎?」
I did, and there was a bunch of lit candles spelling "I love you."
我照做後,看到外面點著一堆排成我愛你三個字的蠟燭。
It was so awkward.
真的太尷尬了。
I went outside and tried to explain to him that he was a great guy, but I didn't like this insane level of control.
我走出去並嘗試和他解釋,他是個很棒的人,我只是不喜歡這種近乎瘋狂的控制。
He was so upset, like he was holding up tears, and I felt so sorry for him.
他看起來很沮喪,還忍著淚水,我為他感到非常難過。
He said that I was his first girlfriend and he felt scared of losing me, and that's why he acted like this.
他說我是他初戀女友,他很怕失去我,所以才會做出這些舉動。
And he didn't see it until his older brother pointed it out to him.
直到他哥哥點醒他,他才發現自己的錯誤。
He asked if we could try again and promised that it would be better this time.
他問我可不可以再給我們一次機會,並保證這次一定會更好。
I wanted to say yes, but I couldn't.
我想要答應他,但是我做不到。
So I politely declined.
所以我有禮貌地拒絕了。
And I felt so bad about it, like I was a bad person for doing this.
我感覺很糟糕,好像我是個壞人所以才這樣做。
But something in me said that all of it would just happen again.
但心裡有個聲音告訴這些事情只會重新上演。
After all, I think that a person shouldn't be in a relationship if he or she is not comfortable in it.
畢竟,我認為一個人只要在一段感情內不自在,就不應該繼續。
Even if you feel sorry for someone.
就算你可能對某人感到愧疚。
Brad is not a bad person.
Brad 不是一個壞人。
But he should have dealt with his insecurities before starting a relationship.
但他應該在解決自己缺乏安全感的問題後,再開始談感情。
Share if you've had a similar experience and don't forget to share it in the comments.
如果你也有類似的經驗,請分享,別忘了在下方留言區分享喔!