To?

To your bank account.

No. - No.

- No. - Fuck, no.

- Nah, I ain't givin' you shit.

- Nah, (laughs) actually.

(dramatic orchestra music)

- [Interviewer] What's your password

- What's my what?

- [Interviewer] Password

- My password?

- I'm not gonna tell you my password!

- [Interviewer] Why not?

- Why are you asking this? (laughs)

- My password?

- [Interviewer] Yeah!

(woman spluttering)

- I feel like this is really sketchy! (laughs)

- One of my passwords for something is pass--

- Pass-- - Password

- Password.

- One, two, three.

- One, two, three, four, five.

- The password to my body?

Or what's the password to, like, my phone?

- [Interviewer] I was thinking to you phone.

- My phone password is--

- Eight, zero, zero, eight. (laughs)

- 69, 69, 69.

- Three, three, three, three, three, three, three.

- It's all threes.

- [Interviewer] Mine too.

- O, eight, o , two.

It's my grandpa's birthday.

- It's my dad's name, who passed away.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- My password!

- To what?

- [Interviewer] Bank account?

- Kiss my ass, now!

That's a zero in there, in the word now.

- I just do different versions of my Chinese nickname and then birth year.

- Birthday.

- Birthday.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- It's something.

- A bunch of numbers.

- It's a lot of letters.

- [Interviewer] (laughing) What's one of the letters?

- Starts with an S and there's a Q in there somewhere.

- There's a five somewhere.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- I'm not tellin' nobody that!

- [Interviewer] Why not?

- My password is the same for everything.

- So, if I told you one password,

you'd be able to unlock my life.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- Why would I tell you?

- [Interviewer] Why not?

- Because this is the internet.

(woman giggles)

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- My password?

- My password!

- Ooh.

- Ooh.

- One, two, three, four, fuck off.

- It has to do with the Pillsbury Doughboy.

(man laughs)

- It has to do something with Zelda.

- It always includes my dog's name.

- [Interviewer] What's your dog's name?

- Java.

- [Interviewer] Why are you telling me this?

- Cause, he's so special!

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- Should I say that?

- [Interviewer] Probably not.

- 4-H-6-8-I-C-V-K.

- Valentine, pizza, 11, asterisk.

- Loser, two, two, one.

- Midnight, swan, double zeros.

- Ravenclaw, with the E as a three.

- Totoro for life.

- Honey bun 88.

- Soup 28.

- I like honey buns.

- I love the outdoors, 50, exclamation point.

- It's hoops 24/7.

- [Interviewer] What accounts do you use that with?

- Most of 'em. (laughs)

- Are the Russians gonna come get my phone?

I don't have that much intel.

- What are you going to do, look at my student loan debt? (laughs)

- The government reads my fuckin' emails anyways.

- [Interviewer] Do you think you protect yourself enough?

- No, on my desk at work I have a post-it note that says my password to everything.

- [Interviewer] Why don't you try harder?

- 'Cause then I'm just gonna forget a password.

- [Interviewer] Have you ever had you identity stolen?

- Probably.

- Yes.

No, I haven't... Actually, I recently did.

- I probably will as a result of this video.

- I've had someone steal my credit card information.

- They like, bought a buncha stuff at Footlocker.

- She ran it up at the sex store.

- One person used $68 at a McDonald's.

- I was gettin' food charges, alcohol charges,

they mighta bought a prostitute, I don't know.

- I have been a victim of identity fraud.

- Hi, to all the other me's out there.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- I'm not not giving you my password.

- What, do you want me to give you my social security number, too?

How 'bout my credit card number, let's do that.

- [Interviewer] Last four digits of your social.

- Um, there's no way.

- (laughing) I can't say my password.

- [Interviewer] Why not?

- Secret.

- Shh.

- I don't have a password.

- [Interviewer] How 'bout your mother's maiden name?

- No.

- [Interviewer] What was the name of your first pet?

- No.

- [Interviewer] What's the make of your first car?

- I'm a woman, I don't drive, I'm not allowed.

- [Interviewer] How 'bout your social security number?

- What is this?

(woman laughs)

- [Interviewer] Last four of your social.

- Two, seven, five, three.

- Three, zero, seven, two.

- Six, seven, one, nine. (laughs)

- [Interviewer] Why are you telling me that?

- I don't know. (laughs)

- My first ever password that I made--

- Was I love Johnny Depp 64.

- Crazy bitch 69.

- Sexy chicks, with an X.

- Just fuck, and then a bunch of numbers.

- One that I used for a really long time--

- Was rim job.

- And I just added one, two, three at the end.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- My oldest son's name and his birth month

- My son's name and his age or his grade.

- [Interviewer] What's your son's name?

- Ben.

- I've had the same password for a long time and it is race car.

- If a squash can make you smile.

- Don't settle, one.

- Capital H, hotshot one, two, three, four, five.

- Should I even be saying these, wait.

- People are making them up, right?

- [Interviewer] I wish more people made them up.

Do you think you protect yourself well enough?

- Physically, like fighting somebody, stabbing somebody?

- [Interviewer] Password protection.

- Oh, password protection, yes.

- [Interviewer] What's your password?

- Bubbles, period, 16.

- [Interviewer] What's that to?

- That's to everything.

- [Interviewer] You just told me your password to everything?

- I mean, you don't know my username.

- [Interviewer] Couple million people are gonna see this video.

- I'm gonna go home and change my passwords. (laughs)

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