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  • Happy Monday to you.

  • Did you have a nice weekend?

  • [CHEERING]

  • I had a great weekend.

  • But I missed being here.

  • My dogs haven't learned to applaud yet, so it's not as fun

  • walking into a room with them.

  • I really did miss y'all, so I want to spend some time right

  • now in a favorite game of mine.

  • This is a recent new favorite game of mine.

  • It's called Spill the Tea.

  • All right, it wouldn't be Spill the Tea

  • without my favorite wild woman.

  • This is Carol, everybody.

  • If you don't remember Carol--

  • [CHEERING]

  • Hi, Carol.

  • Hi, how are you?

  • All right, I'm good.

  • Good.

  • If you don't remember Carol, here's

  • what all you need to know.

  • She likes weed after sex and has been to a swingers party.

  • Welcome back, Carol.

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • I look forward to seeing what this might be today.

  • Let's meet her opponents.

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

  • Hello.

  • Hi.

  • Hello.

  • All righty, you know the expression "spill the tea."

  • It means telling a secret.

  • And I have five secrets that I'm going to reveal I found out--

  • well, someone found out about you.

  • And I'm going to try to match them with the person.

  • If I can match all five, I'll win a fantastic prize.

  • I'm not sure you'll win, but that's not important.

  • OK, the first secret is, "I was kicked out of the Emmys

  • this year."

  • The second secret, "I got a speeding ticket

  • on my birthday."

  • "My husband and I got caught doing the deed

  • in a mall parking lot."

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • "I love putting desserts on top of my food."

  • "I ate my daughter's edibles, thinking they were candy."

  • Mm, mm, mm.

  • All right, I am going to start with "I love putting desserts

  • on top of my food."

  • I don't know why, but it seems like you'd

  • do something like that.

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • "I ate my daughter's edibles."

  • You have children?

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • Yes?

  • I do have children.

  • Do you have children?

  • Yes, I do.

  • Do you have children?

  • In here right now.

  • Oh, it's not you.

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • I'm going to do this.

  • I think you ate the edibles.

  • "Kicked out of the Emmys this year."

  • I think you did something really bad,

  • and I think you got kicked out.

  • You got a speeding ticket on your birthday.

  • I'm just going to take a guess right there.

  • Let me know how many I have right.

  • [DING]

  • [APPLAUSE]

  • I just have to switch two of them.

  • Carol, do you have-- do you have kids?

  • Yes.

  • Am I-- I don't know.

  • Do you have a husband?

  • No.

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • All right, maybe I'm going to say--

  • maybe I'm going to say this.

  • You look like you'd do the deed in a mall parking lot.

  • And maybe you got a speeding ticket.

  • Let me know.

  • [DING]

  • [APPLAUSE, CHEERING]

  • All right.

  • You ate your daughter's edibles, thinking they were candy.

  • That's right.

  • Right.

  • How many did you have?

  • I just had one full bottle of the gel candy.

  • [CROWD GROANS]

  • The squeezeables.

  • I just had one full bottle?

  • One full one.

  • A full bottle?

  • A full bottle?

  • A full one, yes, one gulp, one squeeze.

  • Oh, wow.

  • And how did you feel?

  • Great.

  • I don't feel anything.

  • You didn't feel anything?

  • I woke up the next day.

  • I didn't feel anything at that time.

  • Oh, wow, so you did it late at night.

  • That's right, while watching your show.

  • I'd ask you what show, but you don't remember.

  • And you've got a speeding ticket on your birthday?

  • That's a bummer.

  • How fast were you going?

  • 40.

  • In a--

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • In a what?

  • School zone.

  • In a school zone?

  • Carol!

  • What's the hurry in a school zone?

  • I don't know.

  • Were you on edibles or something?

  • I should have borrowed yours.

  • Wow.

  • All right.

  • And your husband and you, is this the result

  • of it, this little thing inside of you?

  • No, no, no.

  • This is really long ago.

  • It's like, eight, nine years ago.

  • Yeah.

  • How embarrassing.

  • Was it, like, a mall cop that caught you?

  • Yeah, it was a security.

  • Oh, no.

  • Really embarrassing.

  • So embarrassing.

  • Yeah, what-- Cinnabon, or what got you turned on in there?

  • [LAUGHTER]

  • We were boyfriend, girlfriend.

  • It was in the beginning, so--

  • Yeah, so you don't really need anything to turn you on.

  • It's just--

  • No.

  • Foot Locker, let's go get in the car.

  • All right, well, this was good.

  • This was fun.

  • And I am very proud of myself.

  • I did good.

  • That's how you play Spill the Tea.

  • And for sharing your secrets, you're

  • getting a 65-inch TCL Roku TV.

  • [CHEERING]

  • And now, for my secret.

  • Give it up for tWitch!

  • [MUSIC - JAMES BROWN, "GET UP OFFA THAT THING"]

  • (RAPPING) Get up offa that thing,

  • and dance till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and dance till you-- sing it now.

  • Get up offa that thing, and dance till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and try to release that pressure.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake it.

  • Say it now!

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and try to release that pressure.

  • Get up off-- ha.

  • Good god.

  • So good.

  • Everybody ready?

  • Follow me.

  • Get up offa that thing.

  • And shake till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake it.

  • Sing it now.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and try to release that pressure.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake till you feel better.

  • Get up offa that thing, and shake till you--

  • All right, tWtich.

  • [CHEERING]

  • Wow.

  • Since you're not DJing, I'm giving you

  • other things to do over there.

  • You're a carny now.

  • All right.

  • But I think somebody should throw darts at that thing.

  • How about you in the yellow?

  • You're going to play.

  • [CHEERING]

  • Yeah, see?

  • It's how many you can get in 20 seconds.

  • Go.

  • [POP]

  • Go.

  • [CHEERING]

  • You got it.

  • Keep going.

  • Keep-- whoa.

  • Watch out.

  • Keep going.

  • Come on.

  • Go.

  • Go.

  • Keep going.

  • Yeah.

  • [CHEERING]

  • 10, 9, 8--

  • Keep going.

  • [CHEERING]

  • [BUZZER]

  • Wait, that's it That's it, right?

  • Time?

  • You did it.

  • Oh, look at that.

  • Oh!

  • For you, my dear.

  • For-- that's the thing for--

  • This is awesome.

  • That's fun.

  • This is awesome, yeah.

  • Every day, something to do.

  • I love that.

Happy Monday to you.

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