Name: 選擇與連接。如何建立終極關係 (Select & Connect: How to Create the Ultimate Relationship)
Uploaded: 2021-01-14T04:49:43.000Z
Duration: 8 min 52 s
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You have basically to master two primary skills:  you must know how to select and connect.

And you've got to find a   way to constantly improve

the amount of joy, passion and nourishment that's happening within you and for the

a boyfriend, a girlfriend, whatever your language is,

if you want more than that, you want a raving fan.

A raving fan is somebody, if you were going to use a business metaphor, since there are so many

I'll say it again: satisfied customers leave.

If they get a much better deal, a much better opportunity,

But a raving fan customer never leaves. By giving a metaphor in business:

Apple Computers did everything  it could do to screw up

and upset their customer base years ago, didn't they?

and a lot of companies and people who were Apple lovers...

how do you feel--who uses Microsoft products and services? Great.

Then, give me an emotional sound for  how you feel about that company. (Boos)

Who here uses Apple products and services? (Cheers)

And I didn't even have to ask them to  make a sound. Did you notice that?

Make a sound about Apple products. How do you feel about Apple as a company? (Cheers)

and they cheer for Apple. The difference is: people who use Apple are raving fans.

is you want to make sure that you make this person

who's in your life your raving fan. And there's only one way to do that: worship them.

If you want to have something that's extraordinary, because that person who is worshipped

is not going to leave in a million years. What makes them know they're worshipped is the following:

you've got to know what do you really want.

Because everyone is different. We all want love, we want the same needs,

So, some of you may be saying "Tony, this is all very interesting and dynamic but

I don't have a relationship." You've got to know how to start. The first step is to decide what's

What's your vision for what you really want. You can't make something happen until you

get clear. What was the first step of taking something impossible and

You need a vision. Without  a vision, people what?

A vision for what is it I really want most in life, what would excite me,

And I don't just mean a vision of what that person's supposed to look like

or what values they have--that could be part of the vision, but also

what is your vision for what this relationship

that would inspire you  to be in this relationship.

Because without a vision of what  the relationship's going to be,

you're going to settle  for whatever shows up.

All you've got to do is get a  vision that is so compelling to you,

so exciting and so clear that you get so much emotion you'll figure a way

You might say, "but I'm already in a relationship."

Well, remember I said the two skills you've got to have are select and connect?

The first and most important selection you're going to make in your life...

Ninety-five percent of the happiness you're going to have in life is going to

about what is that you really want because

I'll tell you what helped me: if you're brand new and you're single,

the best way to do this is you sit down and you write down every single thing on Earth

you could ever want in the ultimate partner in life. Your ultimate mate. Your ultimate

What you would do together, how you'd share.

But every detail on a level of specificity that normally you would think is insane

And then you've got to make  a second list, I've learned.

And I did this years ago. I made this list

and I read it--it was pretty cool and then I got a relationship. And that in that relationship,

I kind of let it grow because of what most people get in a relationship with. I didn't select

What makes a relationship work is things in common.

Similar dreams or goals or loves or desires.

What makes a relationship work is having things in common

because what that gives you is  the emotion of certainty

that allows you to open up and connect. People like people who are like whom?

and you have certainly about this person. You have connection with this person