that any man

每個男生

can attract women

都可以吸引到女生

any man can be great at that

在這方面，每個男生都可以做的很好

any man can get

每個男生都可以交到

girlfriends

女朋友

have great relationships

有很好的兩性關係

if they put their minds to understanding

只要男生用心了解

what makes the process work

怎麼做可以讓這一切順利進行

how women get attracted to you

要怎麼吸引女孩子注意？

how you need to follow certain principles

該遵循什麼樣的原則

that will make it easy for you and how you need to avoid certain things that

才能更容易達成目標，而且你該避免

may feel great

某些可能讓你自我感覺良好

when they're happening

的事情發生

but at the same time

但同時，這樣的行為

uh... actually obstruct the process

呃，事實上是會阻礙你交女朋友的

one of those things that feels great

有些讓我們感覺良好的事情

but actually obstructs the process

但事實上，卻是我們交女朋友的絆腳石

very often of her becoming attracted to you

常常發生的是，她讓你動心了

is that moment when we notice that

那一刻我們意識到

she is perfect

她是如此完美

when we notice oh she is our dream girl and we see this one girl and we go wow

意識到她是我們的夢中情人，我們望著這女孩，然後，哇

you know I want her to be my girlfriend

你知道，我想追到她

i'm in love

我墜入愛河了

i'm feeling it

我被煞到了

it's amazing

天啊，多不可思議

i've never felt like this before she's perfect

在她之前，我從未有過這種感受，她真是太完美了

you know she makes my

你知道，那女孩讓我

heart sing my stomach

小鹿亂撞

getting butterflies and all that stuff

神魂顛倒

and we get so overwhelmed with that feeling that what happens next is we are here

我們對那種感覺完全沒有抵抗力。接下來要發生的就是，我們在這裡

let's see we are here

瞧瞧我們現在在這

and

然後

basically

基本上

we are seeing ourselves here

我們可以看見我們在這裡

with her

跟她在一起

that's a skirt

這是一件裙子

okay we see ourselves here and we are visualising that

好了，我們看見我們在這，然後設想

this is the end goal and we go straight here in our minds right we imagine

這是最終目標，我們一心朝著這個目標筆直前進，我們想像著

ourselves

我們

together you know whatever making babies yeah

可以和她在一起，你知道的，這個目標不管是什麼，也可能是生小孩吧

we go straight there right and we hope that

我們直直地朝目標邁進，希望能夢想成真

because we are so overwhelmed with our feelings so excited about it

因為我們如此沈醉於這種感受，為此亢奮不已

that naturally

自然而然地，就認為

she must feel the same way when we tell her that we are so excited about it and

她一定也有相同感受，當我們跟她說，可以跟她說話，我們有多興奮

we are so excited about her and she means so much to us

而且，我們對她也是，她對我們意義非凡

and because you know what if somebody did that to us we think that would be

因為你知道的，要是有人對男生做一樣的事，我們會覺得

wonderful right

這真是棒透了，對吧！

so why doesn't it ever work out that way or very rarely

所以為什麼這樣對她不會奏效呢？或者說，為什麼很少會成功呢？

well because what we forget is that

那是因為我們忘記了

it doesn't matter whether we attracted to her

重點不是我們被她迷住了

what's much more important is that she becomes attracted to us

更重要的是，要讓她也迷上我們

nothing is going to happen with her

因為她還是一點都沒有變啊

just because we are attracted to her

就只有我們單方面被她吸引到了

something is going to happen if

有什麼事即將發生，假使說

we are attracted to her

我們的心被她虜獲了

but if she becomes attractive to us now i know that sounds really obvious

但就算現在她看起來對我們也有意思，我知道你一定覺得她表現的超明顯

but very often because we get so overwhelmed with our feelings

但往往是因為，我們愛到沖昏頭，才會錯意了

we forget but that is actually the key thing here right

我們忘了，事實上最關鍵的是

she needs to become attracted to us

她也得被我們吸引

when we jump straight ahead into this thing

當我們朝著目標一路前進

what happens naturally

會發生什麼事呢？很自然地，

we want to tell her how much we love her

我們就會想跟她說，有多愛她

what she means to us and we will know you know

她對我們的意義，我們將知道，你懂的

ask her out and let her know how much she means to us and

約她出去，讓她曉得，她對我們有多重要

you know give her wonderful things and take her to dinner

你知道的，送禮物討她開心，邀她共進晚餐

show her how much we like her

表現出我們有多喜歡她

and what's the reaction usually

接下來，女孩子的反應通常是

well women get faced with this situation are

好吧，遇到這種情況，她們會覺得

oh my god ok this guy really likes me

天吶，這傢伙真的很喜歡我耶

now

現在

clearly

很顯然，

he's pushing in this direction so what i need to do

他很積極地想更進一步。所以女生這時候要做的就是

is either go with that

要嘛接受他

or

要嘛

block him off right

就是阻止那個男孩，對吧？！

so women are presented with this choice of either

所以，女生被要求表態，決定要還是不要

going along with something that they don't yet experience themselves

處理這種沒經驗的事情

so they feel pressure

所以，她們會很有壓力

to go along with what you are going to do which is getting intimate quickly

去面對你猴急的求愛告白，

because you know it's right and you feel great about it

因為你覺得該這樣做，而且還雀躍不已

or to

或者，這會讓女生

keep distance and block you off and you know what say i'm not attracted to you but we can

和你保持距離，阻止你更進一步，然後跟你說，我對你沒有感覺，

be friends or whatever

我們還是做朋友就好了

so they're quickly

所以女生很快地

have this pressure of oh my god

就有這種壓力，天吶，

whether i say yes or no

不管我答應，還是拒絕

will either make him

都會讓這個追我的男生

you know very happy or very destroyed and i basically have his life in my hand

要嘛上天堂，要嘛下地獄，而這生殺大權竟然都操控在我手中

okay

所以

because that's what it sounds like and looks like to her

那聽起來，或看起來就像是

when we want to go straight there yeah

我們就一心想要達陣而已

make sense

是吧

so

所以

women never get a chance to become attracted to you in this process

在這過程裡，女生根本沒機會喜歡上你

do you understand?

懂嗎？

women in that process they don't become attracted to you because they never get the chance to

在這過程裡，女生沒有迷上你，因為她們根本就沒機會

see you grow on them yeah unless they're instantly attracted to you which is not

體驗「慢慢加溫」的這個過程，除非這個女生也馬上就煞到你啦

very often to be honest

但是這種情況真的微乎其微

then they don't really get the chance to

結果從頭到尾，這個女生根本就沒機會

you know get to know you

了解你是怎樣的人，

get to grow some affection some trust with you get to

讓你進入她的生活圈，信賴你，

grow some attraction to you

迷上你

and go step by step

然後一步一步地進展

so what's the key to this

所以，什麼是追到女生的關鍵要訣呢？

look this is a line yeah

看，這是一條線

if you want to go from there being by yourself and dreaming of her... to here

要是想追到她，想達到這裡

being with her

跟她在一起

then there are lots of steps

接下來，中間有很多關卡

to take here okay

要闖關成功，才能到目的地

step-by-step process

這些步驟都不能省

and when we jump ahead

我們要是想一步登天

we mess up okay

就只會把事情搞砸。好了，

what's the first step

第一步要做什麼？

building some trust

建立信賴度

at this stage she still i think you know there's this guy who really likes me he's kind

到了這裡，女生還是會，你知道的，覺得這個追她的男生到底是不是真的喜歡上自己

of good looking but I mean

這個男生長得還不賴，不過我是指

i don't know out

女生會覺得，不曉得

do I know him

我真的了解他嗎？

so is he gonna be weird is he just going to try it

他會不會有點怪？他是不是只是想

uh... have sex with me and

呃，想要玩玩而已

then fuck off or

玩過，就打算甩了我

what's he gonna do i mean i don't know yet

他到底想怎麼樣？我是說，我不知道

there's a bit more at stake for women than for men yeah

這對男生來說可能沒什麼，對女孩子來說卻至關重要

so

所以

first step building trust once you built trust

第一步，一旦建立信賴度成功了，你得到她的信任

second step might be

第二步可能

depends might be to

仰賴於

well

好

laugh for the first time together and i have

逗她笑，一開始就要想辦法讓她開心

have a bit of a laugh maybe flirt with her

也許講些曖昧的話，逗逗她

you know so that might be the second step third step might be to

你知道的，這樣你才有機會發展到下一步，再下一步。搞不好

uh...

呃

be a little bit physical playfully

可以像是開玩笑這樣，跟她有一些肢體上的接觸

get comfortable touching each other getting familiar physically as well right

在你們都不會不自在的範圍內，不過也算是比較親暱的動作了

next step might be uh...

再下一步，呃

you know

你懂的

being

就是

inviting her over dinner and being an environment where

邀她共進晚餐，製造一個情境

you and her are

是你們可以獨處的，

by yourselves you and her

你要想辦法找機會，就只有你跟她

after having built some trust after having built some attraction after getting a

已經建立信任感後，她也開始被你吸引了，

bit comfortable physically and building that trust as well that you

她不排斥和你有肢體接觸，也相信你不是在吃她豆腐

you know that you know how to handle yourself and that you're not weird or creepy or

你曉得，你知道該如何克制自己，不要表現的很怪，讓她會怕你

whatever

不管怎麼樣

okay then you might be in an apartment together with her you know maybe you're kissing or something okay

好了，之後你們也許會在家裡約會，搞不好還有機會跟她玩親親什麼的，好嗎？

that builds more familiarity

那有助於你們之間的關係更親密

then maybe having sex right

然後可能上床，是吧？

that again builds intimacy yet then maybe you're having you are starting to tell each

你們的親密關係更穩固了，也許可以開始

other some some stuff

告訴對方更多自己的事

about each other that is deeper like something that builds even more trust

關於彼此的，更深入的事，那會幫助你們建立信任感

more trust

更信賴對方

and maybe there's more attraction building from that maybe there's more physical

也許她會因此更為你著迷，也許那更有助於建立你們肉體上的

intimacy building from that

親密關係

and then

然後呢

at that stage

到了這個階段

you can talk about any of this stuff if you want

你可以對她暢所欲言了，如果你想的話

but all of these steps

不過呢，這些所有的步驟

need to be taken and crucially they also need to be enjoyed by you

需要做到的，關鍵在於你必須樂在其中

so

所以

the key with this is

關鍵就是

you want to focus on this step first

首先，你要想專注在體驗這個階段

then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this

然後你要想專注在這個階段，還有這個、這個

then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this and then you can focus on that

再過來，你要想專注這個、這個，然後是那個

you don't want to go straight from there to there but want to go there there there there there

你不想直奔本壘，而是想經歷這個、這個、這個、這個、這個

there there there

這個、這個、這個

does this make sense

這樣是不是很有道理？！

step

一步

by

接著

step

一步

so that she is with you every step of the way rather than

所以她和你共同經歷了這個過程，勝過於

you're jumping all the way ahead and then you're basically like forcing her to

你一下子就達陣成功。而那基本上，就像是你強迫她

make an instant life or death decision on your behalf

和你談個速食戀愛。做這樣選擇，代表著你

whether you're going to be happy

不管那是否會導致你過的幸福

and overjoyed

美滿

or forever destroyed

還是，一直都糟透了

because for

因為

because the risk is for her

因為，選擇另一半，是要冒很大的風險的

if she goes along with it while you're jumping ahead

假使她都還沒理出頭緒，你們的關係就大躍進了，

like she might have to finish with you i've been three days yet because she

像這樣的話，可能還不到三天，她就跟你玩完了吧！因為她

does not feel it yet or does not not trust you yet she doesn't even know whether she is

還沒覺得你是對的人，不夠相信你，不夠了解你，不管

attracted to you she doesn't even know whether you are physically you know here

她迷戀上你了沒，她根本就搞不清楚他迷上的是你，還是你的身體。你知道的，

good at like you know

男生都很懂這個

getting it on with her she doesn't even know whether you are a good kisser

和她一起做那件事，她甚至都還不知道你是不是接吻高手

she doesn't know all these things doesn't know wether you and her sexually

她什麼都不知道。她不知道你們在性事上

have something in common wether your dick is small or big or whatever

是否有共同喜好，不知道你下面大還是小，又或者

whether you fit you know all of this stuff

你們在這方面到底合不合的來

uh... so that's why this process has to build one one one one one one one

呃，這就是為什麼所有的過程都要一步一步慢慢來

and you will need to focus on on the next step rather than the big step ahead

而且你需要專注在該怎麼進展到下一步，這勝過一下子就進一大步

make sense

有道理吧

right

是吧？！

i hope this makes sense the step by step thing

我希望追女生一步一步來是有道理的

is huge

是很有道理的

don't jump ahead

不要想速成

just because you feel it doesn't mean that she's going to feel it

因為你感覺怎麼樣不重要，重要的是她會怎麼想

she needs to get attracted to you and for that you need to go step by step

她需要被你吸引，而你需要的是按部就班，慢慢來

and focus on each individual bit

注意每一個獨立的階段

and

而且

and enjoy each individual bit

享受這獨立的每個階段

most guys see this whole dating thing as some sort of like

絕大多數的男生把整個追女生的計劃看成...類似

uh...

呃...

I don't know like a necessary evil to get to the end result

該怎麼說呢，就好像是只注重結果，卻不在意過程吧

and that doesn't work for women trust me

女生不吃這一套的，相信我

okay make sense

好了，這樣有道理吧

I hope you enjoyed my little drawing and if you want more from me of course

希望我畫的這個小圖可以幫助你們享受這個過程，如果你需要更多的幫助，當然

you need to go to the link under the video

你只要連結到影片的下方

and sign up there for my newsletter or whatever else I am offering you of course

訂我的電子報，我會提供你更多資訊，當然是

i've got

我網站裡面已經有的啦

all those steps there for you in my programs as well

也可以提供我這個追女生企劃案，所有的步驟內容

that will help you to take these steps

幫助你執行這些步驟

effectively with confidence

讓你有信心，能有效地執行

and great conversation skills uh... from the actual approaching to the building

還有很棒的社交技巧，呃，透過這些真實的互動方法去建立

trust and

信任感，而且

and making it work on dates and so forth yes

而且在約會時可以奏效，然後，再往下個步驟前進，太好了

so you have all those things there I create them for people who want them

所以，你可以讀取我為有需要的人所創作的所有心得

it's absolutely your option if you want to take advantage of my best stuff in the programs

這完全取決於你，要不要利用我在節目裡那些很棒的點子

and definitely make sure you get more free stuff from me by following the link under the video

而且保證這些資源都是免費的，只要你點擊影片下方的連結

and if you want me to more videos like this if you found this useful

假使你想獲得更多類似的影片，覺得這對你有用，

and you liked it then please click like here under the video

覺得這很讚的話，請點擊影片下方的連結

because that lets me know that you want more of these videos so

因為那樣我才會知道，你需要更多這樣的影片。所以

thanks very much take care

非常感謝你的關注，也請注意

and try to think of it in this way rather than going all the way

執行的時候試著回想一下我講的話，而不是一路衝到底

into the future try it out a few times and just

以後要是有機會的話，試試看

gently bring yourself back to focusing on what's right here in front of you rather

溫和地把自己帶進這些步驟裡，專注眼前所處的階段

than that

好過

the big goal in the future okay

直接抵達未來那個遠大的目標

and you see

而且你看

you will take the girl with you in the process and you enjoy the process a lot more and

你要是帶著女生，按照這樣的步驟進行，在這過程中你會更享受

you'll be focused much more

也可以更沈浸

in the moment

在那個當下

because that's key when you try to get a girlfriend

因為那是重要關鍵，當你試著要交到女朋友的時候

i speak you very soon

這就是「交女朋友，按步驟來」簡單的心法