Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles hey it's Stephan Erdman here alright now if you know me then you know that i believe that any man can attract women any man can be great at that any man can get girlfriends have great relationships if they put their minds to understanding what makes the process work how women get attracted to you how you need to follow certain principles that will make it easy for you and how you need to avoid certain things that may feel great when they're happening but at the same time uh... actually obstruct the process one of those things that feels great but actually obstructs the process very often of her becoming attracted to you is that moment when we notice that she is perfect when we notice oh she is our dream girl and we see this one girl and we go wow you know I want her to be my girlfriend i'm in love i'm feeling it it's amazing i've never felt like this before she's perfect you know she makes my heart sing my stomach getting butterflies and all that stuff and we get so overwhelmed with that feeling that what happens next is we are here let's see we are here and basically we are seeing ourselves here with her that's a skirt okay we see ourselves here and we are visualising that this is the end goal and we go straight here in our minds right we imagine ourselves together you know whatever making babies yeah we go straight there right and we hope that because we are so overwhelmed with our feelings so excited about it that naturally she must feel the same way when we tell her that we are so excited about it and we are so excited about her and she means so much to us and because you know what if somebody did that to us we think that would be wonderful right so why doesn't it ever work out that way or very rarely well because what we forget is that it doesn't matter whether we attracted to her what's much more important is that she becomes attracted to us nothing is going to happen with her just because we are attracted to her something is going to happen if we are attracted to her but if she becomes attractive to us now i know that sounds really obvious but very often because we get so overwhelmed with our feelings we forget but that is actually the key thing here right she needs to become attracted to us when we jump straight ahead into this thing what happens naturally we want to tell her how much we love her what she means to us and we will know you know ask her out and let her know how much she means to us and you know give her wonderful things and take her to dinner show her how much we like her and what's the reaction usually well women get faced with this situation are oh my god ok this guy really likes me now clearly he's pushing in this direction so what i need to do is either go with that or block him off right so women are presented with this choice of either going along with something that they don't yet experience themselves so they feel pressure to go along with what you are going to do which is getting intimate quickly because you know it's right and you feel great about it or to keep distance and block you off and you know what say i'm not attracted to you but we can be friends or whatever so they're quickly have this pressure of oh my god whether i say yes or no will either make him you know very happy or very destroyed and i basically have his life in my hand okay because that's what it sounds like and looks like to her when we want to go straight there yeah make sense so women never get a chance to become attracted to you in this process do you understand? women in that process they don't become attracted to you because they never get the chance to see you grow on them yeah unless they're instantly attracted to you which is not very often to be honest then they don't really get the chance to you know get to know you get to grow some affection some trust with you get to grow some attraction to you and go step by step so what's the key to this look this is a line yeah if you want to go from there being by yourself and dreaming of her... to here being with her then there are lots of steps to take here okay step-by-step process and when we jump ahead we mess up okay what's the first step building some trust at this stage she still i think you know there's this guy who really likes me he's kind of good looking but I mean i don't know out do I know him so is he gonna be weird is he just going to try it uh... have sex with me and then fuck off or what's he gonna do i mean i don't know yet there's a bit more at stake for women than for men yeah so first step building trust once you built trust second step might be depends might be to well laugh for the first time together and i have have a bit of a laugh maybe flirt with her you know so that might be the second step third step might be to uh... be a little bit physical playfully get comfortable touching each other getting familiar physically as well right next step might be uh... you know being inviting her over dinner and being an environment where you and her are by yourselves you and her after having built some trust after having built some attraction after getting a bit comfortable physically and building that trust as well that you you know that you know how to handle yourself and that you're not weird or creepy or whatever okay then you might be in an apartment together with her you know maybe you're kissing or something okay that builds more familiarity then maybe having sex right that again builds intimacy yet then maybe you're having you are starting to tell each other some some stuff about each other that is deeper like something that builds even more trust more trust and maybe there's more attraction building from that maybe there's more physical intimacy building from that and then at that stage you can talk about any of this stuff if you want but all of these steps need to be taken and crucially they also need to be enjoyed by you so the key with this is you want to focus on this step first then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this then you want to focus on this and then you can focus on that you don't want to go straight from there to there but want to go there there there there there there there there does this make sense step by step so that she is with you every step of the way rather than you're jumping all the way ahead and then you're basically like forcing her to make an instant life or death decision on your behalf whether you're going to be happy and overjoyed or forever destroyed because for because the risk is for her if she goes along with it while you're jumping ahead like she might have to finish with you i've been three days yet because she does not feel it yet or does not not trust you yet she doesn't even know whether she is attracted to you she doesn't even know whether you are physically you know here good at like you know getting it on with her she doesn't even know whether you are a good kisser she doesn't know all these things doesn't know wether you and her sexually have something in common wether your dick is small or big or whatever whether you fit you know all of this stuff uh... so that's why this process has to build one one one one one one one and you will need to focus on on the next step rather than the big step ahead make sense right i hope this makes sense the step by step thing is huge don't jump ahead just because you feel it doesn't mean that she's going to feel it she needs to get attracted to you and for that you need to go step by step and focus on each individual bit and and enjoy each individual bit most guys see this whole dating thing as some sort of like uh... I don't know like a necessary evil to get to the end result and that doesn't work for women trust me okay make sense I hope you enjoyed my little drawing and if you want more from me of course you need to go to the link under the video and sign up there for my newsletter or whatever else I am offering you of course i've got all those steps there for you in my programs as well that will help you to take these steps effectively with confidence and great conversation skills uh... from the actual approaching to the building trust and and making it work on dates and so forth yes so you have all those things there I create them for people who want them it's absolutely your option if you want to take advantage of my best stuff in the programs and definitely make sure you get more free stuff from me by following the link under the video and if you want me to more videos like this if you found this useful and you liked it then please click like here under the video because that lets me know that you want more of these videos so thanks very much take care and try to think of it in this way rather than going all the way into the future try it out a few times and just gently bring yourself back to focusing on what's right here in front of you rather than that the big goal in the future okay and you see you will take the girl with you in the process and you enjoy the process a lot more and you'll be focused much more in the moment because that's key when you try to get a girlfriend i speak you very soon
A2 step attracted trust focus process doesn How To Get A Girlfriend Step By Step - Stephan Erdman 3066 234 阿多賓 posted on 2014/01/22 More Share Save Report Video vocabulary